Kates lesbian open diary

7/2/2009
It hasn’t been a whole week yet since my grandmother passed away and I can’t but feel like there is this huge weight that has been lifted off the family. We all miss her deeply, but we all stood by and watched as she withered away and finally died. It was this experience that I will never forget. I think that I am glad that she has passed on. She is no longer in pain. She had a good long life and the stories that my grandfather tells about her make me smile. He told me that day we laid her to rest that he knew the moment he met her that she was the one for him. He knew then that she was the most beautiful woman he would ever see. I then asked him when he had met grandmother for the first time. He smiled and said kindergarten! They had been high school sweethearts before my grandfather had enlisted in the air force during WWII where he had become a prisoner of war. My grandfather had finished his tour of duty and was waiting with his crew to be released to head home when their replacement crew didn’t make it. So my grandfather and his crew were asked to fly one more time. It was then that they were shot down and the crew became POWs. Meanwhile, my grandmother went back to school and got a degree and starting teaching at their local high school. She clipped every newspaper article about my grandfather and still has them today. My grandfather told me that after months of being a prisoner their captors marched them all night and all the next day without a word of what was going on and then that night they bedded down and in the morning when the crew awoke they were alone, their captors gone. The crew marched all that day to a small town where they meet up with friendly soldiers who helped the crew get home. While in that small town where the crew tasted their fist bit of freedom after many months my grandfather bought a set of glasses with gold rimed tops that he later gave to my grandmother as a wedding gift. June 25, 1948 they became husband and wife. June 25, 2009 would have been 61 years of marriage for my grandparents and was also the day we laid my grandmother to rest. My grandmother ended her life with 3 children, 6 grandchildren, and 8 great-grandchildren. I can’t imagine the life that my grandparents shared or the love that kept them together for all of those years. I just know that my life has been so enriched with the stories that my grandfather has told me of their younger days. He has shown more strength than I would have thought was possible in this last week. He has had his moments when I had my doubts that he would be able to make it through this, but he has shown me a side of himself that shines with an inner strength that not many people have. I made a promise to my grandmother and I intend to keep it at all costs. I will be there with my grandfather as often as I can to help him pass the time and maybe even have a little fun until his journey comes to an end.

7/14/2009
I am so tired. I feel like I am just starting to become that worn down lil numb of a person. My goal for today is to get everyone taken care of today and I am going to crash no matter what time it is. Taking care of my grandfather is taking more out of me than I thought it would. I don't know why, but every time I get into a situation like this I am always surprised when the emotional side of things and the always on the go mode take such a strong toll on me. When will I ever learn? I feel bad because I don't want to go to my grandfather's these last few days. I know that part of it is because my most dear friend in the whole wide world has been here since Saturday and I know that the time we get to spend together is short and far between and I didn't want to miss a moment. It was bad enough that I had to work the last two days when I really wanted to call in and be sick so I just spend that time with her, but I didn't. We had a really good visit ... she got to meet my partner and loved her which means the world to me. Not that it would have changed anything if she had liked my partner, but it would have hurt me to think that my f riend didn't like my partner. BUT in the end they got along wonderfully .... So for the most part it has been a wonderful weekend. I am sad that she is leaving, but I know I will see her again soon. I would like for the next visit to be on her turf instead of always being on mine. Beside I would love to see the lights of a big city. Never been to her home town before. In my mind ... I would like to plan to go before the snow hits the ground this year. I am the mind frame that it has to be. I just have to go and see her in her home town. It is not too far from me.